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Sunday, January 30, 2011

The Dance of Revenge - Chapter Nine

I'd like to welcome all my new followers here since last week. Hello! Lovely to have you here. :) 

If you haven't had time to look around (and please do) then you may not yet be aware of my weekly Sunday post: The Dance of Revenge.

Dance is the story of Sherrie Dolty - a young, french, ballet dancer whose mother has married a man Sherrie despises. After an horrific accident, Sherrie finds herself separated from her mother and it's here we pick up the story. (You can read all the chapters so far by scrolling down the RHS of my homepage, looking for the pink ballet slippers, and clicking on the links underneath.)

Oh, I should most DEFINITELY tell you that I wrote this book when I was 14. Yes. About 26 years ago. I've dusted it off and posted it here for your reading pleasure. And for fun. You see, my writing back then was still...developing shall we say?

Here we are at Chapter Nine. Last week, Adam went home to tell his new wife the news: that he couldn't find her beloved daughter, Sherrie after the train derailment. Of course, this was a lie, as Adam had attempted to cover up the truth of Sherrie's survival so that he could finally be rid of his financial strain. There were many 'pokers' involved in last week's chapter. You'll just have to go back and read if you want to know what the hell I'm talking about.

In this week's chapter, we find out if Sherrie has woken since her ordeal, and if she recalls who she is....

As always, my comments will be written in [red in square brackets like this]. Enjoy...

Chapter Nine

THE cold sheets that lay beneath Sherrie's body helped soothe the soreness a little. Sherrie lay with her eyes closed as she could not open them. She didn't know why, but they just wouldn't part. Where was she anyway? What had happened? And then she remembered. The accident on the train. What had happened again?

Footsteps came towards her and she clenched her fists in fright. Then she heard hushed voices. 

"How is she doing, nurse?" Sherrie decided it was an English or Australian voice. 

"Very well, doctor. I think she has come out of her coma." [I'm pretty sure they'd be able to tell this by Sherrie's fist clenching etc, non?] This time it was a french nurse who was probably young and pretty. [Cliches would say so.] She was in a hospital. Where was her mother? She could not speak, either. [I think I meant that 'Sherrie' could not speak. Not her mother.]

"Doctor Wilder? Where is her mother and father? She's been here a week now. Where are they?"

"Well, Miss Shonti, I heard that no one claimed her. But we can't say who because her face is completely ruined and you can't tell much from her body either [I'm not quite sure what I meant when I wrote that], and there were others who haven't been found yet and also others that have been...well, abandoned, I guess." [Seriously, what's the chances of more than one person abandoning their loved ones in a train derailment?]

Sherrie couldn't hear much of the conversation, but she caught enough to know that her mother and Mr Brair had not collected her. They would have known by her ring. Sherrie's heart stopped. Where was her ring? She could not feel it. It had to be there. There's no way it could have fallen off. Her heart ached. They had probably took it. [I think I meant 'taken', don't you?] Her mother and Mr Brair. There was financial difficulty, of course, and they would save money not paying for her funeral or medical treatment! Sherrie's eyes stung with hurt and anger. Then the tears came, hurting her face all the more. [You know, if that doctor and nurse haven't jumped in yet and said something to her, then they are seriously incompetent at their jobs.] And what had they said about her face? RUINED! Her life was over. Now. 

*     *     *     *     *

Doctor Wilder looked at the young girl who sat in the corner. She had come here a month ago. The train accident had left her without the memory of anything. [Probably 'without her memory' would have worked too.] She could not remember her mother or father at all. Now her eyes were open and they were beautiful and brown. Wilder knew that she would have once been beautiful. But now...

Jim Wilder now strode over to the girl and sat beside her. If he could, he'd adopt her. But he had no time for such a girl. Though he wish he had. He'd had a daughter in Australia once, but she had died in a freak accident in a bus. [Ok, then...] That was six years ago, and when it happened he and his wife have moved over to France. She had been french [probably still is] but they had separated and now he didn't know where she was. 

"How're you doing, kiddo?" he asked the girl.

"I'm alright Doctor Wilder," she replied hoarsely. Her speech had only come back three days ago. 

"Come on, kid. You can call me Jim. You hear?" She nodded in agreement. 

"Oui, monsieur." Her hands were still bandaged and so was her face. Except for her eyes. 

"Have you remembered anything about your past yet, kid?" The girl shook her head and Jim sighed. It was so damn frustrating. If she didn't remember in another week, she'd have to be fostered into a family, and he hated doing that to kids if they already had a family. This was worse. She'd never have her normal face back to normal. [Is it normal to use the word 'normal' twice in a sentence like that?] He got up and said a polite goodbye to the girl after asking her if she wanted anything to eat. She had said, "Pas encore." Not yet.[I tell you, that french traveling dictionary thingy I had back then came in REAL handy.]

*     *     *     *     *

Jim sat in his office a week later looking at two of the most richest couples in all of this side of France. Their names were Pierre Silk and Marianna Silk. [Two couples? As in...two husbands and two wives? No? Tsk, tsk.] Both french and they both had a son who was in college in America. [Is it the same son, do you think? Or did they amazingly both have sons that went to school in another country? I don't think we'll ever know...] They had come to foster 'the kid' as she hadn't remembered anything yet. She always seemed quiet and distraught and this worried Jim. But Jim was glad that Mr and Mrs Silk had come to foster the kid, as she would get the best treatment. They had also both agreed to put her in a 'face place' as they called it - so that she could have cosmetic surgery. The kid's first reaction was "The Silks? I'm going to stay with them?" He had told her about the cosmetic surgery and he had thought he'd seen her smile slightly, but he couldn't be sure. [Hey - how come he didn't twig that she knew The Silks? Wouldn't this raise questions about her memory? Once again, I'm pretty sure this doctor is actually dodgy and got his medical degree from a Wheeties packet.] Now he turned to Mr and Mrs Silk. 

"Are you sure you want to do this? It'll cost a lot of money, you know, and the best surgery I know is the one in the capital city of Paris. [Just in case the couple from France were unaware that Paris was the capital...you know?] Are you willing to pay for her flight there and accommodation of six months in the clinic? Plus the cost of surgery, food etc..." Both had smiled and Madame Silk had given a quick, "Oui!" So it was done. The papers were signed and the kid was theirs. 

"Come back and see me some time," he demanded to the kid. 

"I will, monsieur. I am even speaking a little Australian now. Such bad habits!" And she had laughed. It was the first time he had heard her laugh. "Goodbye...Jim."

"See-ya, kid." As he watched her walk out with Mr and Mrs Silk he had tears in his eyes. He hoped to see her again some day. 

*     *     *     *     *

Sherrie's eyes widened in shock when she saw the limousine parked outside the hospital. Madame Silk laughed when she saw her surprise. 

"It is our car, madamemoiselle. Ours." Sherrie looked at her in amazement. 

"You don't mean..."

"Yes. Yours too." With those words, Madame Silk rushed Sherrie in to the car. Sherrie had heard about the Silks when she was ten. They had been in the paper for some reason. Sherrie thought she had done well in the last few weeks faking her amnesia. [Not too difficult when the medical staff are a bunch of dumb-dumbs.] She had thought before about somehow getting her face changed, but when Jim had told her about the Silks, she had been delighted. She wanted revenge on her mother and Mr Brair for what they had done to her. And now she'd get it. 

"Now, ah.." Madame Silk started. "Oh, my. Little madamemoiselle, we must have a name for you. Why don't you choose one?" Sherrie hadn't thought about changing her name before. 

"Choose one? Any one?" Madame Silk nodded. So did Monsieur Silk. Now she remembered a name that has been one of her dance teacher's. 

"Could I have, ah, Louina?" She watched Madame Silk smiled with satisfaction. 

"Louina Silk," she muttered. "Wonderful! What do you think, Pierre?" He nodded, smiling. 

"I like it. It does have a ring to it, doesn't it?" Marianna asked. "Louina Silk. I love it. We'll get it finalised tomorrow before Louina goes to the clinic. Is that alright with you, Louina?" Sherrie smiled. Louina Silk. She liked it herself. 

*     *     *     *     *

Her name was finalised. [Just like that? Wow.] She would now be known as Louina Silk. Louina found it hard to get used to her new name, but she knew that someday she wouldn't even think of being known as Sherrie Dolty. Today was the day that she would go to Paris to the clinic for cosmetic surgery. She couldn't wait, but was a little scared. Maybe one day when she was a famous dancer she would reveal to all that her real name was Sherrie Dolty and not Louina Silk. But there was a problem. If she danced, Doctor Wilder would soon find out who she was as she was the only ballet dancer who was hurt on the train accident. She suspected, anyway. It would not take him too long to find Mr and Mrs Brair. 

Louina had thought of a plan though. For the six months she was at the clinic, she could practice her ballet privately in her room. And then when she got out of the clinic, she could take private lessons with the pocket money Madame Silk said she would give her. Then when she was eighteen, she would be allowed to do as she liked. She could convince Jim and her foster parents that it was her life and she did not want anyone to know about her past. They could not stop her from being Louina instead of Sherrie. 

Madame Silk sat beside Louina on the flight. Already Louina liked her. She was very kind and caring enough to stay with her for the six months she planned to stay in Paris. 

"Madame? Will this cosmetic surgery hurt?" It had been a question that had been bothering Louina more than the question of why her mother had abandoned her. Even though she sort of knew the answer to that. Mr Brair. She still hated him. Even more now. 

"Let us get one thing straight, ma chere. Please call me Marianna, alright? Madame or Madame Silk is too formal." Louina smiled. "Now, about the surgery. In all my honest truth, ma chere, it will hurt at times. Sometimes it may be very painful. I want you to try and be strong. You are already strong. You have proven that by living with us and being strong about not having your real parents with you." Louina frowned a little, but just for a short time so Marianna couldn't have seen it. She hoped she hadn't anyway. 

"Thank you, Ma....Marianna." She smiled at the woman who gently patted her hand. 

Time flew by and it wasn't long until Paris finally came in to view. Louina had never seen it before and she was all wide-eyed at everything she saw. It was purely beautiful. 

Finally the plane landed and Marianna and Louina stepped off the plane with a flourish of delight. Louina wore a large hat so her face could not be seen. She was very embarrassed and felt terrible when children her age looked at her and made horrible faces. [I'm presuming she still has the bandages on though, right? Otherwise, that'd be the fastest healing time in history for the burns that she was supposed to have sustained in the train wreck. In face, the whole recovery process has been super-duper quick, hasn't it?]

It was an hour's drive from the airport to the clinic but Louina didn't mind. She liked looking at all the different places in Paris. The clinic was very private and was supposed to look like a fantasy island, [you have to give me credit for a WILD imagination back then] except it was in the middle of a huge city. [That'd be the 'capital city of Paris'. Just in case you still weren't sure about that.]

When they reached the doors they were welcomed by a lovely plump lady who told them her name was Francine. 

"You call me Frannie. I'm sorry I do not speak English much. You speak french, non?"

"Oui," Louina replied. Frannie smiled joyfully.

"This girl is here to have her face changed. She doesn't know how to have it changed as she doesn't know how it was before. The records will tell you why." Marianna said this all in french. "Her name is Louina Silk." [Oh dear. It's like the woman has walked in to a hair salon and is talking about her latest hair style!]

Louina realised at that moment [that Marianna is a bit ditzy? Don't blame you, Lou], that the remains of Sherrie were soon to be rid of. She would no longer be Sherrie Dolty, but finally she would be Louina Silk. 

Well. Isn't that handy? We had another french lesson today, a history lesson and a lesson in medical terminology! Ahem.

My commenter last week - Mark - was almost spot on (clever you, Mark)! VERY Return to Eden (as I mentioned in my first post on this actually - I was totally influenced by that mini series)! No burlesque dancing though - but I'm now wishing I'd gone with that. Wouldn't it have made a good storyline?!

Stay tuned next week for the next exciting (and no doubt educational) instalment of Dance.


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